There Is A Light That Never Goes Out

I went for a birthday party some time last year (ages ago, I know) and it was my first real experience. I wrote about it in my book, and thought that perhaps it was time to share it with you.

 It goes:

When I arrived, I felt as if I'd been introduced to the land of the living, the home of the free, and the bungee-jumpers with no strings attached. What is this place? Are these real people?
I was cascading in the colourful darkness of alcohol-induced lust and the necessary pain of walking in heels. We were elegant peacocks, all of us; comparing plumage and strutting with airs. It was a facade, of course it was, but it was new and I was enjoying it.
Is this what it means to take your life into your own hands? What is this intense compulsion to give yourself away to all the other free souls?
Adulthood is never awarded gradually.
There is no simple way to become accustomed to it. It is a mechanical beast that feeds on uneasiness, peer pressure, the desire we all harbour to fit in - and this beast is relentless! It sucks you into this spasming chaos unrestrained and the vortex doesn't become apparent until you are drowning in it. But it's almost as if it can't be helped; you must endure. You must pull through, because adulthood is on the other side of it. You'll only know you've reached it when the buzzing world has become merely a sickening thought and the sticky sweetness of nostalgia is the only reminder.
I've only just arrived.
I'm not ready to leave yet.
This is the transition state of my being.